Today I’m sharing with you all a short film I made on a touchy subject; Abusive relationships. They are usually relationships where one part has all the power and the abuse can be physical, emotional or psychological.
“I love you Not” has a positive message, it is up to you to take control and regain the power by leaving it all behind. The freedom and peace of mind will be worth it and you will feel a sense of empowerment that will help you regain control of your life. It can also appeal to those of you who are going through relationships where one part makes all the effort and you feel like you are too lucky to have that person in your life so it’s okay for him/her to do as they please and get away with things that in a normal /healthy relationship are not okay.
Because of my films on female subjects and articles I’ve written I have been invited a few times to talk about relationships, I really have no advice other than it is always better “out” than “in” when “in” means feeling down, feeling alone or feeling unappreciated. If you have discussed all these issues with your partner and all you get is indifference then the “no answer” is your answer. Life has a wonderful way of giving us all what we need and what we want at the right time but in order to get there, we must leave behind all those things that feel wrong.
Lately, I get emails from women stuck in what I call “Infantile”/”Immature” adult relationships. Those of the digital age where a “Facebook like” can make you feel exuberant,or a “smiley face” can make your day because you finally heard from the person you desperately like for no obvious reason. I mean, do you want to spend the rest of your relationship waiting for a ghost to appear when they like and disappear at no notice only to reappear again out of nowhere? Again , do yourself a favour , give your heart some peace of mind. It is a delicate organ after all!
Another relationship bound for disaster is the one where one is scared of saying what you feel in order not to upset your partner or worse, in order for your partner not to leave you. I know a lot of women scared of saying to their boyfriends they would like commitment and eventually a family. If that is what you want you better be clear from the beginning because you can’t force someone to do something they don’t want and you don’t want to waste your time in a relationships where both parties have very different goals. Also, you cannot change people so you either accept them as they are or get ready for massive misunderstandings.
There is a moment in life when you no longer want the experience, when all you want is simply a healthy and happy relationship. You deserve it and you will have it but it won’t come if you are determined to make a broken plate a brand new one.
So beautiful and so true. Your words are so touching. One thing we never get taught is that we must find ourself and truly love ourselves first, before we find ‘the one’ and the happy relationship.
Thank you! unfortunately many incredibly intelligent people are stuck in unhealthy relationships where their self esteem goes from high to low, this can lead to depression or to feelings of sadness. Loving yourself and respecting yourself means having enough self worth to walk away even if this means loneliness or uphill roads for a bit. It will be empowering and the freedom we will get from it, worth it.
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I totally agree!!
WOW! you word if so well, i’ve just written a piece about this. Im going to make my sister watch this as she is one of the said relationships. I wish someone had shown it to me when i was younger, as i went through it also. Very touching and powerful stuff!
Thanks a lot for your kind words. You can also have a look at “How to move forward in life” and “How to have a great relationship: Unleash the Carmen Within” It doesn’t matter you learned your lesson later than you would have liked it, who hasn’t? The thing is you did learn something and you used your experience to grow into a wiser woman. That is why i believe women we get more interesting and wiser as we age regardless of the beauty industry playing with our insecurities. Wishing you and your sister the best relationships with yourselves and your partners.
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